Night Cry
This week we had a follow-up visit with Dr. Nunns. He removed all the plastic and metal from Shea's mouth last week, and this visit allowed him to have a good look in her mouth without all the hardware. Her back tooth needs to be extracted, and he told Shea he will remove it during her first surgery. Many of her teeth are broken, so it looks like she'll need at least six crowns. Dr. Nunns said that we can decide on the surgery date as long as he and Dr. McKay are both available as they will perform the surgery together. We have decided to have the first initial surgery in April, and next week we'll find out the actual date.
Around 2:30 this moring Shea came into our room apologizing for awakening us, but she needed to talk. We sat on her bed, and she poured out her heart. When our kids were little we could kiss their owies, put cartoon band-aids on them and smile as they happily skipped away. Not so last night. "Mike is dead, and I don't look like myself anymore." Trying to process it all is overwhelming right now, and Shea needed to cry and talk into the night, and so we did. We didn't have anything profound to say except that everything she is feeling is normal -- time can be the enemy. We told her that one day she will awaken and the first thought of the day will not be of the accident. How long will that be? Wouldn't we love to know. Shea recognizes that God is doing a great work in her life. She knows "all things work together for good . . . ." . . . she "will come forth as gold" and "God meant it for good" -- and on and on, but sometimes the daily battles are just plain hard.
At about 4:00 this morning Luke came out of his room and joined us on Shea's bed. It was sweet to see the two kids lying next to each other -- both wounded in different ways but feeling each other's hurts. Sometimes the sweetest times come about in the simplest ways. We left Shea's room and peaked in again at about 8:00 this morning to see both kids snoring under Shea's electric blanket! It took us back to when they were little. Luke, afraid of the realistic life-sized jungle animals Steve painted on his bedroom walls, always ran to his big sister's room for comfort in the night. Last night was different. Luke sensed his big sister needed him, and he was there to comfort her.
Shea just read what we have written and said, "You guys, don't depress our awesome bloggers"! So you can see that today is sunnier and brighter for our sweet girl!
Love to all you awesome bloggers! --
Steve and Susan
Around 2:30 this moring Shea came into our room apologizing for awakening us, but she needed to talk. We sat on her bed, and she poured out her heart. When our kids were little we could kiss their owies, put cartoon band-aids on them and smile as they happily skipped away. Not so last night. "Mike is dead, and I don't look like myself anymore." Trying to process it all is overwhelming right now, and Shea needed to cry and talk into the night, and so we did. We didn't have anything profound to say except that everything she is feeling is normal -- time can be the enemy. We told her that one day she will awaken and the first thought of the day will not be of the accident. How long will that be? Wouldn't we love to know. Shea recognizes that God is doing a great work in her life. She knows "all things work together for good . . . ." . . . she "will come forth as gold" and "God meant it for good" -- and on and on, but sometimes the daily battles are just plain hard.
At about 4:00 this morning Luke came out of his room and joined us on Shea's bed. It was sweet to see the two kids lying next to each other -- both wounded in different ways but feeling each other's hurts. Sometimes the sweetest times come about in the simplest ways. We left Shea's room and peaked in again at about 8:00 this morning to see both kids snoring under Shea's electric blanket! It took us back to when they were little. Luke, afraid of the realistic life-sized jungle animals Steve painted on his bedroom walls, always ran to his big sister's room for comfort in the night. Last night was different. Luke sensed his big sister needed him, and he was there to comfort her.
Shea just read what we have written and said, "You guys, don't depress our awesome bloggers"! So you can see that today is sunnier and brighter for our sweet girl!
Love to all you awesome bloggers! --
Steve and Susan
posted by admin | 7:31 PM
19 Comments:
And love right back to you awesome Hickoks!!!!
The Walshes
Hi Shae.
I must admit I cried when I read about you and Luke comforting each other. That's very special.
I know how frustrating it is not to be able to drive, etc. We will pray that the Lord gives you peace, and that you will be a regular at Starbucks soon.
We continue to pray for you daily, especially Emily when we pray at bedtime.
I'm looking forward to church tomorrow, and seeing (most) of your family. I hope we see you soon, too. Especially Sunday night. The Jr High girls are just itching to give you a big hug. Well, we all are, actually.
You keep healing, and we'll keep praying.
...Tim
Hi Shae.
My first reply to this seems to have disapeared.
I was telling you that I was touched by how you and Luke have been able to comfort each other. Very special.
We continue to pray for you, and we look forward to seeing your family at church tomorrow.
... blessings!
Hi Shea! I've been wanting to write for some time. I've needed to ask Tim what our username/password is. Seems like when I'm at the computer, he's not around. Sorry about that! But! please know, I read your blog everyday and have since day one! Our family has told so many people your story and so many prayers have gone up and continue! I LOVE to hear how God has and is working in your life Shea...it is such an encouragement to me! Bad days are all relative...wow! Thankyou for letting your parents share whats going on at home. The tears and the sad times. It is personal, but helps us with specific prayers for your family, plus the encouragement. Well Shea, we sure love you and your precious family! I will write again and look forward to your next blog!!! Love, Julie Hoag (Tim's wife) :)
It's gotta to be hard, I can't imagine. But, though Mike isn't here with us anymore, hes with God. Though we all miss him so much.
Luke, your such a great brother for being there for your sister when she needs it. It probably helped you too. Most brother would probably think "she probably just wants to be alone with mom and dad, i'll let her be" but, you knew that your sister needed your. Your a great brother. I'll see you tomorrow, and probably call you soon about next week.
Shea,I hope you had an amazing day today, even though your hard night. Tomorrow, like all Sundays, I look forward to seeing your dad, and Luke up on stage. And see hopefully Jess and your mom.
I love you, girl! Your always in my prayers. Along with the rest of your family, the Jones family, and the band.
Tell sweet Cali (I heard she hasn't been too good though) I said hi, and I hope to see her this week!
Megan Kucala
Shea, I can't imagine how hard this is. But knowing that Mike is with God, is a great thought.
Luke, you are such a great brother to Shea. You knowing she needs a brother to be there for her, where most brothers would probably think 'oh she just wants to be with mom and dad, i'll let her be'. I bet, being able to comfort her, helped you too. I will see you tomorrow, and will call you soon about lessons.
Shea, girl, you are always in my prayers. I think of you so much.
Tomorrow, like all Sunday's, I am looking forward to seeing your dad and Luke up on stage. And seeing Jess and your mom.
The JH girls miss you so much. But, Oh, do I too.
You, your family, the Jones family, and the band are in my prayers all the time.
I love you girl.
Tell Cali I said Hi, though I heard she hasn't been too good lately, and that I hope to see her this week.
Megan Kucala
Shea,
There you go again; thinking of others first. Thinking about the blogger's feelings. You are so sweet.
We are so blessed by the love of a family comforting each other. When all does seem so hard; we can praise God for His family plan!!! Where would we be without that great love and care? How great a brother to just be there for his sister, and what a blessing for your Mom and Dad to see that love!!
Hope your day is brighter today and the love all around you will help you get through and be your strength.
Blessings,
Denise N
... very, very honest ... and real ... and precious. I close my eyes and envision this scene ... these scenes. Once again you have shared deeply and given us a glimpse of Immanuel in the throes of life. Prayers continue. I feel part of "family", though I know you not ... Blessings and love in Christ, a friend from Darien :)
hey shea!
Luke is one of a kind, and you guys are lucky to have one another!
What a sweet brother to sense you needed him like that. :) I always have such mixed emotions when i read this..I smile to hear that you are doing better, but cry hearing what you're having to go through.. i wish i could be there for you and hug you and tell you everything will be okay, but just consider this an e-hug! :) Reality is probably starting to kick in now, and you have to deal with a lot, so just know that i am here if you ever need to talk.. I love you and miss you soooo much!! Can't wait to hear from or see you soon!
Love, Dani :)
I have been reading this blog for a while and I finally got to guts to post a comment!
I'm Michele Randall (Scottsdale,AZ)...I was friends with Luke when I was in 8th grade (he was in 7th). Luke, Colt Kimmel, Natalie Kitson and I used to have so much fun together at Church..
Anyway,
I love reading this blog and Shae, you are in my prayers constantly!
Much Love <3
Thank goodness for family!!! You all will get through this soon. The pain is so real and new and God will continue to heal all the empty and painful places. Thank you for sharing so openly. You have absolutely no idea of the great witness your story is to each of our lives. Oh, I hope your pain subsides soon. I also hope that the surgeries result in miraculous results! Thank heavens we have God's promises, but there are still such dark times that seem so desolate. Keep hanging in there.
"As for me, the nearness of God is my good; I have made the Lord God my refuge." Psalm 73:28
May God continue to be your refuge and hiding place. Jesus will heal your heart and your body!
Lots of love and prayers-
Marian Madden
hey beautiful♥
how are you? aw this blog entry i must say is just too cute about you and luke. =] i miss church on sunday so i made dory tell me EVERYTHING. lol. she said that you might be comming to church real soon. so im not going to miss my chances so im going to church every sunday for now on so i wont miss a day when your there! =] oh my gosh. guess what? well this might be kidna weird/funny. but yesterday i was in the bathroom starightning my hair and like i was playing around with my sister tht i was going to cut my hair cuase i always wanted bangs.. and i wasent paying attention and i cut my hair! but its on like on the top where the bangs go and its not short i juss cut off like 2 inches of my hair. it doenst look ugly but i need your mad skills to fix it! ;) gosh shea each and everyday i miss you more and more! im just dying to see you!!! haha you might laugh at me but i start writting in this book for what im going to tell you becuase im afarid ill forgit and i just started yesterday and im on my fourth page. haha. its quite amazing. i would rather give you the pages then tell you cuase i would go on and on forever! haha. but shea. my goodness. you are such an amazing girl. you are one true hero. :) i love you beautiful shea! you have such a wounderful family! i am still praying for you and your family. i love you girl. im going to ask jenny or something if i can have your number or something so we can tlk! but thts only if you approve! :) i love you and im counting off the days when i can drive you to starbucks when im 16! LOL! j.k!
love you tons
jenn
Hey i just about lost it when i read that blog. i have finally begun to realize that gift of friendship i havein my brother daniel. we are so close and its so comforting to havethem there for you when you need it! well its dinner time, so i need to go but im thinking and praying for you!
rachel
Shea~
You don't know me, but I am a friend of a girlfriend of someone who is close to you. I've been hearing your story & reading your updates just about every single day. I've actually been thinking about commenting for a while, but have been too nervous to do it...
You are such a strong girl, and I wanted to let you know that I am praying for you, all the way out in California. I've actually been telling some friends about you too, and we've all been praying for you. They constantly ask about your updates...
I know this is a hard time for you, but just remember that Mike is looking down on you...and smiling. And just think---he's chillin' with Jesus. How cool is that?!?!?
Stay strong... You're being thought about all across the country.
~ KP
Dear Shea,
I was just watching this Christian comedian who is so funny; yet she just spoke of her bout with severe depression. She told of how she would pretend all was ok, but then came to a point where she just had to, be still and know God was God. She still deals with it but fills her home with praise music and scripture all around. I was falling asleep and praying, and when I prayed for you, faithful, just came to my mind. God is so faithful. I was putting words to it about how God is faithful:
F- First in your life
A- Always there with you
I- Intimately knows you
T- Trustworthy and true
H- Healer
F- Friend
U- Understands all you are going
through
L- Loves you so much
He is so faithful and cares so much about His sweet daughter.
Just try to be still and know that He loves you so much!!! Scripture and praise music are the healing balm we all need!!!
Praying for you,
Denise N
Hi Hickoks,
I am blown away once again by the innermost workings of your family. I know the Lord has brought you closer than you could have ever imagined because of all of this...the framework was always there, but the suffering and turmoil has made you all into such a beautiful picture. It is a gift to open the blog and see the portrait you have painted for us that day...you are real, and open and honest, and it blesses me so much. You are teaching us how to endure, how to keep the faith, and how to be real inside of it, and I thank you for the raw truth of it all. The beauty is unbelivable, and you are blessing us all because you continue to make all of this about Jesus, and none of it about yourselves.
I wish I could take away the pain, yet I am so amazed at what the pain is producing in you, and I can feel God working every time I visit here with you. You are daily miracles...fish and loaves every meal, storms calmed each evening, tombs emptied every morning...and it's all because you gave yourselves over totally to God's will. It's scary, and yet you make it look like not only the only choice, but the finest choice.
We're crying with you in your pain, and we are rejoicing with you in your victories...and we are all growing with you in our faith! I can't wait to see Jesus with you...keep pressing on toward his upward call!
Love, hugs, tears and rejoicing,
Tracy Goble
thanks for sharing.
In the bible so many passages start with "and it came to pass." I continue to read because I am interested in what has come to pass. Look at how many times it has come to pass for all of you. "And it came to pass Shea awoke in the night with a broken heart and turned to her family for comfort." I read because in all the invents that take place, and all that continues to come to pass, the Lord is turning the pages...because He's already in tomorrow and He's waiting for you. Love, Debbie Miller
I keep a little radio at my desk and I just heard a sweet song- and a beautiful voice and it just reminded me of you! I hope you are having a great week. Just a little note to let you know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Keep hanging in there as I know you are doing.
Love and prayers- Marian Madden
Love to all the Hickoks--
We hardly know what to say--it's been so long since we've seen you all--but we have been and will continue to pray for all of you through this long process---what a blessing that we don't have to be together physically in order to pray--God has been so good and merciful--we praise His name--
May He bless you richly in all things,
The Doziers
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