The Knitting Continues!

It's Tuesday morning, Steve's birthday. The kids got up a little earlier this morning to prepare a big breakfast-in-bed for their dad's special day. We gathered around Steve and sang "Happy Birthday!" and the five of us sat around the bed reminiscing and laughing about lots of family memories. We dreamed about the possibility of taking a family trip to somewhere none of us has ever been -- Luke teased Shea that with 45 screws in her face, we'd need extra time at the airport for her to be frisked! I looked around at our family, overwhelmed with joy and gratitude realizing we are all here together.

As we talked, we asked Shea to do the eye test. Every few days we pull her hair back away from her eyes and ask her to scowl, raise her eyebrows, wrinkle her nose, etc. This morning there was new movement!! We all saw a flicker above her left eyebrow, and she was able to squint the eye as well!!!!!! What a gift on this special day! We cheered and thanked God for His beautiful handiwork -- the Master knitter! Even though we are saddened that Bill Jones, Mike's dad, does not have Mike with him today, (today is Bill's birthday as well) we know that he rejoices for Shea and truly loves her like a daughter. Happy Birthday, Billy! We all love you!

Thanks to all of you for rejoicing with us as we rejoice and weeping as we weep. It's a blue sky, sunny day here in Atlanta and in our hearts.

Warmly,

The Hickoks

Rehab Alumna!

Thank you for all the great comments, prayers, calls, cards -- We are blessed by all of you, our friends. In addition to this, many from our church family have prepared and delivered wonderful meals, and we are grateful for your labor of love for us.

Friday was graduation day for Shea! It was her last full day of rehab, and her little ceremony was at 3:00. All the therapists were there and her psychologist as well, and each commented on Shea's accomplishments. At the end she was given a certificate of graduation from Shepherd Pathways Rehabilitation. Everyone clapped, pictures were taken, and we said goodbye to all of the patients and therapists whom Shea had befriended while there. She will only need to do physical therapy on a regular basis and occupational and speech therapy as needed. A psychologist is available for Shea as well. A program called The Bridge is an extension of Sheperd Pathways, and they will keep in contact with Shea for a year or as long as is needed.

Shea has been spending a good amount of time this weekend alone. That's not typical of Shea who normally flies through life at the speed of light! She enjoys it at times, and then there are times of discouragement -- times when she wants to grab her keys and go to Starbucks with friends, help out with the Jr. Highers at church, drive to work and be independent. Thankfully, that will all be a reality again someday. Shea has taken up knitting, of all things! "Mom, it's all the rage, you know"!! So she's working on a beautiful olive green scarf -- it's the size of a coaster right now, but it's coming along!

Shea's CT scan is scheduled for Tuesday at Scottish Rite Hospital. This will help Dr. McKay determine for sure what procedures will need to be done at her next surgery.

That's pretty much all our news here. Thanks again for your prayers and your continued interest in our sweet Shea.

Love to you,

The Hickoks

Tough Words to Hear

It's Thursday morning and Shea is back at rehab. Yesterday we had an appointment with a plastic surgeon, Dr. McKay. We were hoping to hear good news -- as in, when the swelling goes down we'll only have some minor things to fix, but that was not the case. She will have a CT scan soon, but Dr. McKay said that it looks like when the swelling goes down, Shea's face will not be symmetrical at all. It looks like the orbit which should have grown together nicely has instead overlapped causing the bone to jut out. He will have to rebreak the bones around the orbit to repair that area. Also, he's not sure if her jaw may need to be rebroken as well. Dr. Carey did tell us that that was the most critical area to fix as the left mandible was pretty much destroyed, and he warned us that she may need future surgeries to get it just right. The superior maxillary bone, the bone above where her front teeth were, will need to be grafted from her hip, and her nose will be done last as it sets on top of that bone.

I could tell Shea was disappointed as Dr. McKay shared the news with her, but she held it together and asked many good questions. When we got to the car, the river of tears flowed and flowed. It's been 2 1/2 months now, and Shea is recovering slowly but nicely, and now the thought of having to go back in to have the face and jaw rebroken is a little overwhelming. So without sugar-coating anything, last night was pretty dark. We prayed together, cried together. These are times when Shea doesn't really like pep talks. It's okay to be sad and disappointed, but our tendency is to "fix it" and make everything better for our kids. We're learning.

As Shea was getting ready this morning, I asked her how she was doing. She flashed me her beautiful toothless smile, and said, "I really am better now." And we both knew she meant, "Joy comes [again] in the morning."

Thanks for listening. Thanks for praying.

Love,

The Hickoks

Thank You, Gracie

It has been awhile since we last communicated, and we want to let all of you know how things are going with Shea. On Wednesday we had a meeting, at Shepherd Pathways, with all of Shea's therapists. We sat around a table and each therapist shared Shea's progress. It was all good news! She will be released on January 27th from full-day rehab! We have another meeting on Monday, and will get more information on the next program which will be more part-time, and we may even be able to find a facility closer to our home. So once again, we are thankful that there is more good news, and God continues to answer our prayers.

We continue to see slight improvements in Shea's appearance. A little wrinkle appeared on the left side of her nose as she tried to wrinkle it up for us! (Imagine praying for more wrinkles!!) Also, when Shea scowls, we can see muscles moving on the left side of her forehead, but when she tries to lift her eyes, as in a surprised expression, her left eye and the left side of her forehead show no movement. The surgery was seven weeks ago, and we are a little surprised that Shea still has quite a bit of swelling, but the doctor said this may take months to go down.

Shea is encouraged that her eyesight in her left eye is better! At first she saw a big black spot that eventually turned red. Now the spot is smaller and lighter in color as well. She doesn't want to see a doctor yet as she wants to wait to see God work. Today Shea was reminded of the verse, "Be still and know that I am God," and told us that that's exactly what she believes God wants her to do. it's easy to become frantic and rush to doctors to find answers, but now is the time to sit and wait and pray. Please continue to pray!

Every day after rehab we are all anxious to hear about Shea's day. She always has the sweetest stories to tell us. At first Shea was dragging her feet, so to speak, as she went off to a full day of rehab, but that has changed, and she is determined to look for those who need encouragement. Seeing many who are much worse off than she is amazes her that she has been spared the long recovery of a brain injury. Wanting to make the best of her situation, she asks the other patients about their accidents, One was a stroke in childbirth, another "car surfing" with his friends, a construction accident, gang fight, falling off a quad, dialing on a cell phone while driving. It's unbelievable that Shea is completely sound in her mind. We thank you again and again for your prayers.

Today, Shea talked to her almost four-year-old cousin, Gracie, on the phone. How sweet to hear that little angelic voice.

Shea, oh, your voice is beautiful
It's good to hear your beautiful voice too, Grace
We all cried -- mommy, daddy, me, gramma, papa
Ohhhh
Shea, I pray for you
Thank you, Gracie
Are you all better?
Almost, sweet girl
Why?
Little Gracie prayed to Jesus and Jesus heard her prayers, that's why
Are your owies all gone?
Not yet, Gracie, but I'm getting better
I'll still pray for you, ok Shea?

What could be sweeter than the faith of a child? Shea has received cards and letters from classes of children. They aren't afraid to draw pictures of a wrecked car, sad faces and tears on stick figures. Shea is also encouraged by their honesty as they boldly speak of death and sadness.

We are rejoicing today as God continues the healing process in Shea's body.

Love from the Hickoks

Celebrating Life

Today Carie and I left our little family in Georgia and flew back to Arizona. We took with us many precious memories of our time spent there with the family that we love so dearly. I believe we have all learned to truly celebrate life from our little Hickok family. When the wrinkle of Shea's scowl crept across the bridge of her nose and extended on to the left side, there was a moment of great celebration. She is truly learning to maneuver around those 8 plates and 45 screws that are in her face. Her eye is looking better, and even though her orbital fracture around it hasn't grown together yet, we are seeing changes and swelling decrease and those changes are duly celebrated. Pieces of the accident and Shea's missing month spent in the coma are slowly falling into place. The blog has been a wonderful part of that experience for her as she is now able to read it on her own. It also appears right now that she will not have to have surgery on her knee and that was grounds for more celebrating. Though she walks with a brace from thigh to ankle, she has completely abandoned her walker and her nickname "Scoot" as well. Shea is also beginning to think of ways that God might use her in the future, to use this experience to help others who are struggling with difficulties similar to hers. So celebrating purpose in all things was also something that we were able to share in.

Apart from our busy lives at home, we were able to feel that time had slowed down and there was time to reflect over and over on God's goodness. We were able to encourage Luke that he too is going through a healing period. His scars are as deep as Shea's injuries, and we aren't able to see visible signs of healing on a regular basis as we do with her, so the turmoil of his emotions need to be turned over daily to the one who can heal his heart and mind. He is so precious, in the blink of an eye he was suddenly thrust into manhood. This has changed his life forever. Our prayer is that God will use him mightily for His glory as he learns to depend on Him for each step of his life's walk.

Steve and Susan spent a difficult week with sickness and pain. Susan is still dealing with a great deal of numbness down her leg and the bottom of her foot, but is slowly beginning to feel better. The Lord helped Steve Sunday morning to be able to lead both services at church in spite of a bad throat and cold. It was the first Sunday for two services and God certainly blessed there. Their bodies have let down as have their emotions and it is a time for healing for them as well.

We were also able to celebrate life with their new dog Cali. We can truly see why God sent even this little animal to them and the timing of everything as we watch Jess lying on the couch side by side with dog's legs intertwined in boy arms when they aren't romping in the woods together. Even Cali has been a blessing and therapy for little Jess.

Saturday morning the boys were gone and only the girls were at home, 2 mothers, 2 daughters, sitting around the table in the morning sunshine reading the Psalms and praying together. We were thanking God for his faithfulness and his goodness to us in so many ways, again recounting and celebrating life itself with our Shea. What a wonderful time that was for me. I will never forget the peace and love as we quietly sat around that table enjoying the joy of the Lord together, laughing, loving and truly basking in the presence of God. It reminded me of Lamentations 3 where it talks about it ...being of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed because his compassions never fail, they are new every morning, great is thy faithfulness! The Christian walk is done one step at a time that starts every morning with renewed compassion and faithfulness. What a wonder that though we are miles apart, God should allow us as a family, to take those steps together as we walk this life with Him. Thank you all again for your words of encouragement, and please continue to pray for the Hickok family.

DeDe Forbes

My Cousin, The Treasure

When my mom, my son and I set out on our trip to Atlanta a little less than a week ago, I was so nervous, hoping and praying that God would give me the right words to say to encourage my cousin Shea, and the whole Hickok family. Little did I know, I would be the one who would end up encouraged and ministered to. As I have spent time listening to Shea processing the events of the last eight weeks, and filling in the blanks to the missing moments of her life, I am overwhelmed by the sense of peace and strength that Shea has as she rests in God's promises and goodness. She truly has found shelter under the shadow of her Father's wings. She has never become angered by what has happened, but continues to remind us that this was part of God's plan for her life. What an example of God's grace she has been to me in these days as well as to countless others. Thank you Shea.

We also have been encouraged that during a week's time, we have seen more movement in the left side of Shea's face. She is able to smile evenly and her dimple is more beautiful than ever. The spot in her left eye has improved as well. Shea believes that her vision is getting much better as she is able to see more clearly. Please continue to pray that her body will absorb that extra blood and that her vision will be completely restored.

Shea is also continuing on through the long days of rehab. Her stories of the experiences she has in convincing them that she is not brain damaged have kept us all entertained, and we look forward to the hysterical updates at the end of each day. As always, she has been instrumental even in encouraging the other patients, and was recently involved with helping a therapist with a break through on a patient whose therapy has been very difficult. Steve and Susan have a meeting with her therapists this Wednesday. Please pray that the report will be positive and that Shea will be released soon.

Exhaustion is part of the reality of what the whole family has been through. And there are still dark times as Shea works through the grief and pain that has become a part of her journey, but she continues to keep her eyes fixed on her Savior. Even when the dark clouds roll in, the light of God's goodness breaks through as her walk towards healing and complete recovery continues.

What a privilege it has been to be here and see the beauty of God's miracle unfold before us as we lift our hands to Him with thanksgiving for what He has done and continues to do in our Shea. She truly radiates the beauty of God's glory and shines brighter than any star I have ever seen.

I love you Shea, my treasure,
Your Cousin,
Carie

Here at Last

This is Steve's sister DeDe from Arizona. My daughter Carie and grandson Wesley Michael and I are so thankful to finally be here at last. When you are waiting in line to come and help behind that wonderful Anderson family you just have to learn to be patient! We are thankful to our God for all of them with their love and care, as well as for all of you, whose constant words of encouragement on the blog have meant so much to the Hickok family. With so much of the tragedy behind them, they are finally letting down and feeling the exhaustion from those recent days of stress and anxiety. Getting back into the routine of every day life with the addition of all the rehab, doctors appointments and school makeup work, etc is a little bit difficult when they are so weary, but they are truly praising God for all of His abundant blessings.

When we arrived here on Monday evening and walked through the door, we could hardly believe that our little Shea was walking down the hall to greet us. To be able to touch and hold this little miracle is one memory that we will always cherish. She was truly a beautiful blessing to behold!! Although somewhat different in her appearance, she shines through as the precious little niece I have always loved. We have spent quite a bit of time now, especially as it has been my privilege to drive her to therapy in the mornings, reflecting on what God has done in our family. Shea amazes me for I have never once heard her complain about why God would allow such a thing to happen in her life. Her concern is for the sorrow and worry she brought to those she loves and why God would choose her to show His glory. What a special blessing she has been to my own life to be able to share what this has done for me personally in my Christian walk as well as others whose lives have been changed forever because she was his vessel, created, broken and brought back to a place of healing and service for Him to be glorified in. What an honor it is to be a part of her life. She is challenging me every day to be thankful to God for all things.

Please continue to write and pray for this family. There are dark times ahead, as there is a long, uphill battle for this little thing with all the challenges and surgeries that she will need. Rehab is a daily trial that is terribly difficult for her to get up and face every morning. Discouragement as healing slows down is also a very real opponent that can weigh heavily on her spirits. Yet, praise God she is walking hand and hand with Him, looking for the reason He has for her to serve Him. Pray for Steve as he re-enters his busy life with minimal energy. Pray for Susan as she is struggling with the sciatic nerve in her back and has been down for a few days, unable to meet the challenges of coping with children that really need her now. Pray for Luke as he struggles in the quiet moments of his life with thoughts that haunt him and the "whys" of his life. That he would truly know the comfort that only his God can give. Pray for Jesse as he catches up on his schooling and the curses of multiplication that he is presently struggling with. In reading Isaiah 63 last night before I went to bed it said:

I will tell of the kindnesses of the Lord, the deeds for which he is to be praised, according to all the Lord has done for us--yes many good things he has done... In all their distress he too was distressed... In his love and mercy he redeemed them; he lifted them up and carried them.

He has truly been faithful to his word. What a blessing it is to be a child of God.

DeDe Forbes

A New Day

Today is Sunday, and Steve, Luke and Jess are at our church, The Bridge, for the first time since the accident. They are looking forward to seeing all of you and thanking you for your prayers and encouragement. Shea and I have been praying for our church family today as you worship together --- wish we could be there.

I wish you could really know how the responses from the last blog have encouraged Shea. She just told me -- "Please tell everyone thank you again for all their kind words and their prayers for me." Shea is doing so much better. There will be more times of discouragement, we know, but for now, we are seeing progress. Her knee is healing well, and the doctor thinks, that if she continues with the rehab and wears the leg brace, she will not need surgery after all! We can see that her knee is stronger every day, and sometimes we even catch her trying to do more than she should -- must get that independent spirit from her dad!! Shea still has a hole where the trach was, but it is covered in gauze and tape. The doctor said that those holes usually close up in less than a week but thinks Shea's will probably heal in about three weeks. We are seeing more facial nerves working -- at the left side of her mouth and the side of her nose. The nerves above Shes'a left eyebrow and around her eye are not responding yet. Thank you for continuing to pray for complete restoration and for coming BOLDLY to the throne of grace with us.

Have a great Sunday, everyone!

Much love,

Steve and Susan

Back to Macon

Yesterday we drove to Macon for Shea's follow-up appointment with Dr. Carey who performed Shea's facial reconstruction surgery. The waiting room was crowded so Shea found a seat next to a young girl named Portia. Soon the girls were talking back and forth as if they were old friends. Portia has been struggling with seizures, and so the girls exchanged their stories. After awhile, Portia was called to her examining room and we to ours. Pretty soon sweet Portia came in our room with her Bible and asked if we could show her the verses Shea had been sharing with her. She placed her Bible on the examining table, and I watched as two girls desperately struggling in different ways leafed through the pages of God's Word for comfort. The comments from the last blog have been a huge encouragement to Shea. Since her eye is bothering her still, she asks us to read and reread the blog to her! Shea understands your concern for "flinging" Bible verses at her, but she says, "Bring it on . . . it's what I need." Thanks, Karine, for sharing Isaiah 49 with us. We thought it amazing that a message Shea's grandpa preached a year before she was born would be used to bring comfort to his granddaughter almost twently years later, long after he was gone. He makes "mountains into roads . . . and the roads will be raised up."

Dr. Carey examined Shea and saw that things were moving along slowly. Shea was hoping that he would get all excited, and say, "You're going to be fine -- all the nerves in your face will soon come alive and you'll be your old self again." But that wasn't the case. Shea asked him, Will I be myself again?" He responded, "You are yourself, Shea." He reminded her of what she had been through, and said that we have to keep waiting -- maybe months but there is no promise that all the nerves will come alive. She began to cry and said, "Dr. Carey, a lot of who I am is my expression." He again reminded her that she is herself and can show expression, just not maybe as much. So we reminded Shea that this is where we exercise faith. The doctors in ICU told us that when Shea awakened, because of the blow to her head, she would not be herself -- maybe for six months to a year. That was not the case. Miraculously, and by God's grace, we do not have to wait for healing in her brain, but God has allowed us to exercise faith in other areas.

Being a pastor's kid, Shea has been concerned that all of you "bloggers" be encouraged as well! All you PKs out there will know what we mean! The last few days have been shadowed -- loss, uncertainty, pain. Shea mentioned last night that she wants to be honest but doesn't want to be a "downer" to all her friends (new and old) and family. "But I should be honest, shouldn't I? . . . so they know how to pray."

Last night Shea watched the DVD of Mike's funeral for the first time. From the very first frame where she saw Mike's casket with the beautiful spray of red flowers, she began to cry. "Oh Mike." We all gathered around her and experienced the service with her. The reality is setting in with all of us now (seven weeks later) that we are out of ICU and Shea is stable. Shea was nodding along as different people shared about Mike's life. He loved Jesus . . . he loved his family . . . his friends . . . was a friend to the friendless . . . loved his music and on and on. She cried and smiled as Luke and Blair hugged each other. Her heart went out to Kyle who lost his only brother, to Deborah his sweet mother, to Billy (as Shea calls him), Mike's dad whose heart is as big as the world and to dear Anna, Megan, Emily and Katie. So, honestly, it was a dark night for us -- Shea finally drifted off to sleep at about 3 this morning.

It's early afternoon now, and Shea is still sleeping. We called Pathways, where she is in rehab, and asked for a day off. They wholeheartedly agreed that this was the best rehab for her today.

Thanks for hearing our hearts. "Joy comes in the . . .afternoon?"

Our love to you --

Steve and Susan

Two Days at Pathways

It's been a few days since we updated everyone on Shea's progress. We're moving right along in rehab. Shea is fine with it, but is a typical teenager when we awaken her early to get ready for "school." Tonight Shea told us about all the different activities she has to perform. At this point, it doesn't seem at all hard for her, but it was frustrating when she first met the therapists -- they enunciated every word slowly and clearly and asked very elementary questions. Shea thinks that because one side of her face doesn't quite work yet and is missing teeth it makes her look a little "slow." We teased her that she's in HR -- Honors Rehab!!

We have had some difficult days. It's interesting to us that coming home is a new reality to us. Shea is home where everything is familiar, but everything isn't the same. Mike is no longer here, and Shea has many limitations and uncertainties. The other night she was struggling with how her face looks --wondering if God spared her life but maybe would allow paralysis to remind her of the miracle of survival. She was feeling a little guilty asking for yet more. She asked us, "Have you ever looked in the mirror and not recognized the face looking back at you?" It seems that for every other situation in our kids' lives we have been able to say that we've been down the road before and can see around the corner. This whole situation is new to us. We have never experienced what Shea and Luke and the guys in the band have gone through. It's comforting, when you have no words to say, to turn to The Comforter. We read Psalm 30 together. "I will praise you, Lord, for you have rescued me. You refused to let my enemies triumph over me. O Lord my God, I cried out to you for help, and you restored my health. You brought me up from the grave, O Lord . . . . Weeping may go on all night, but joy comes in the morning . . . You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mouring and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever."

This afternoon 500 of Shea's CDs arrived at our house! We are excited that they are finally here. Many of you have asked about purchasing the CD, and we will let you know about a website where you can do that very soon. Shea's desire is that this blog be one of prayer and praise and not for the sale of her CD.

God bless and thank you for continuing with us on this journey,

Steve and Susan

Happy New Year 2006

Yes, and a blessed year we have enjoyed again in 2005. It is good to rethink on the goodness of our Great God in bringing our Shea so far so quickly from that fearful moment in the early hours of November 19 in multiple miracles to Christmas at home and to outpatient therapy for the New Year.

What an honor for me to be writing these lines and what a joy to share in continuing the good news that Shea has been released from Shepherd's in Atlanta.

And then to know that Dr. Carey, who did Shea's reconstructive oral and facial surgery, wants to see her on Wednesay this week in Macon. I'm sure the entire staff at Children's Hospital will be happy to see their miracle girl and her progress in the short time since her release from that I.C. unit.

My heartfelt thanks to all who were willing and able to be there for Shea and for her testimony to the grace of her amazing God.

Jerry Anderson (Shea's Grandpa)